Pre-Orientation

I recently complete a supposed 15 hour Pre-Orientation course in preparation for Korea. The biggest chunk of it is psychology, methodology, and pedagogy, but there's a few lessons on Korean culture as well.

I have to say, all of it is like a throwback to my psych and rws courses in undergrad. I've realized that I am no longer in a place in my life where I am responsive to the traditional college classroom, where you show up, listen to lecture in a survey class while taking notes, in order to prepare for some exam in the near-distance future. I still take notes like a fiend, but the random busywork of homework and the like bores me to no end. I think I respond better to the ridiculous reading lists and paper writing of grad classes. I don't think I have the patience to deal with the former any longer.

anyway, as I'm worked through the pre-orientation course, the reality of my whole situation started to feel just that much more: in about a month I'll be standing in front of a classroom in a completely different country with kids (?) whose first language is different than mine.

I want the whole experience to be good on both of our parts.

I know that's asking a lot, since not everything in the classroom is always or ever, perfect for either party, but I just hope we can come to an understanding. I'm dreading re-living the experience I had the first time I stood in front of a classroom as an instructor. I'm praying to God that it doesn't happen again. I don't know how I'd be able to bear it.

Sometimes I get visions of myself in front of the classroom, doing exactly what I should be doing in an ideal world, and then I see myself how I actually am in front of the classroom, and I wonder at the distance between the two visions.

I'm getting anxious.